Finding Joy

Being joyous sets the stage for more joy in life. Recently, the word joy was used to describe the crowds and positive energy of a recent Democrat political rally. The people attending the rally and those reporting on it described the experience as a refreshing change of joyous fun. People looked like they were enjoying a chance to share views and imagine other possibilities.

As humans, we are attracted to joy and positivity. It does not mean that we should avoid serious issues. We all benefit from listening to every point of view with open, possibility seeking and inclusiveness, even when the ideas and deeper conversation is a challenge.

I breathe easier in joyful moments. It brings a sense of relief, a smile, a longer exhale, and less stress my way. May 2024 - Hakone Open Air Museum, Japan

There is also a reduction of fear and as David Whyte says, in his book called Consolations, “to be joyful is to walk through the doorway of fear, the dropping away of the anxious self…a giving away, overheard in the laughter of friendship.”

I don’t know about you, but I want joy. It relaxes and energizes me. Not every day is joyous, and I get that, however, if we come from a mindset of abundance rather than deficiency, a learning rather than fixed mindset, the path seems lighter.

People who are important in my life seek joy as well. That is why when I read a passage from Neil Pasricha’s book, The Happiness Equation, it immediately resonated with me. He introduces the concept of “the five people test.”  Who are the five people on your team, in your life, who influence your confidence in a good way and affirm your authentic self? Who brings you joy? It is said, you are the average of the five people around you. Look at the people who are close to you in your life, and I hope they are positive energy forces?

My clients find me when their career joy is illusive or lost. They are looking for more personal satisfaction and meaning. They forget to focus on moments of positive accomplishments, even if what seems small is important. We all have unique personal strengths that each of us might overlook or underestimate. I have learned that most of us have one or several people close to us who support us and see us as we are.

So, what are the benefits of having a select few around you who bring you joy and make you smile?

Health – Joy lowers chances of heart attack, lowers blood pressure and is a boost to our immune system.

Well-being -- There is a psychological aspect here of well-being that connects to an individual's greater purpose and meaning. This is crucial for our happiness. Joyful states enable us to cope with unexpected life challenges and I find it is easier to be hopeful.

Survival – James Clear, American writer and speaker, known for his book, Atomic Habits, said, "We live through hard days so that we can enjoy the good days." I can survive those bad days or downturns in life or mistakes that get blown out of proportion when someone in my circle of friends or family listens and understands me. If you are with people who see a glass half full in life, you will survive and thrive.

Social – Joy is not only a personal but also a social experience. We uplift others beyond our first five people close to us. I observe a ripple effect of happiness when I am with others in my extended network and learn about them, exchange ideas, or just offer a listening ear.

We are programmed for joy. It is deeply ingrained in our DNA. I am grateful for my moments of joy. I started keeping a gratitude journal many years ago. A long-time friend, Charles Antis, CEO of Antis Roofing, gave me a gratitude journal and it has become part of my two minute daily personal practice. It is a grounding and a quick exercise to think about what you are grateful for every day. It just takes a moment at the end of the day. Life throws us unexpected curves and it can derail us when we least expect it. Being grateful returns us to the center.

Here is a reminder – be of service. Help others find their sense of joy. Offer help to others, and you will see their mood and yours improve. Trust this process.

What is your place in conversation with others? When you enjoy being with a familiar face, are you catching up since last connecting and are you listening for an opportunity that might be there for both of you? Share smiles, laugh at yourself, and celebrate a delightful moment together. That is simply finding joy.

Have a great day - Sherry

Written by Sherry Benjamins - sbcompany.net Helping others create a new chapter of work